And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Randomize