I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
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