i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
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