I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
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He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
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It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
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