I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
It's official drugs can't kill me
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
I have peed in a lot of sinks
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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