This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
Randomize
