Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize
