I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
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