She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Randomize
