When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
