Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
Randomize
