we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Randomize
