She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
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