I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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