I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
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