All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
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