Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
Randomize