just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
