hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
He has the fingertips of a God
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