dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
Randomize
