Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize
