I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
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