i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
Never underestimate the power of titties
Randomize
