And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
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Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
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Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
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