is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Randomize
