guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
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