yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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