I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
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