I'd wear matching sweaters with you
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
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