just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
