There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
