im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize