I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
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