You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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