Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
don't judge my taste in strippers
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
Randomize
