That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
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