im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
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