idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
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