I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
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