I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
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