I puked a lego.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
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