Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
Randomize
