if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Randomize
