yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
