i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
Randomize
