And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
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Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
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Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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