ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Randomize
