dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
Randomize
