That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
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