awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
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