This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
Randomize
