new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
Randomize
